Feb 09 2008
Can your boss be your friend?
I was in BlogExplosion today and saw a blog with a post titled ‘A boss is not a friend’ in its archive. Though I have clicked away and couldn’t read the content, I thought the subject was very interesting.
Well, if the definition of ‘boss’ is merely people that you work with, either you report directly to, or someone who has direct influence on your career, then I have worked with many bosses since graduated.
Let me count… Wow, 12 bosses! And yet I have ‘only’ worked 10+ years. Well, actually the more stunning number is: 11 bosses in 6 years. Since I worked with the current boss 4 years ago, things got stabilized.
Whatever it is, I don’t think I’ve come to any friendships in any of my bosses. They are bosses, they cann’t be my friends. I have high respect of them, I see big gaps in our experiences, I just cannot treat them as my friends.
No, don’t take me wrong. They are very friendly type of people. Some of them are very motherly/fatherly, some still go clubbing, some look very young, some very kind, some very down-to-earth, etc. I guess it is probably me.
I am really curious to know, whether your boss is also your friend? How do you feel about it, if he is also your friend?
one of my subordinates is my very close friend. I would say it is really not easy… but we could handle the situation quite well now, of cause there were a lot of difficulties along the way.
hmm…Yeap…very difficult to handle it.. especially when you start to think of resign or not happy with the pay or whatever regarding the company except the boss.
hai…my boss treat us as friend and she really good to us..We talka alot about personal thing and she also very helpful too..But, sometimes i have to lie lor…cann’t tell all the truth mah..if not take leave also susah lor.. :p
Sometimes, I do think that if she not treat us as friend then I could just dump the resignation letter and cabut without think too much liao.
this strongly depends on the personality of the boss, and if i mind him/her to be my friend.
I had alot of boss and all of them are still friends with me…we can go get drunk if we have time…
well, I was in the Medical line…so no harm here.
azrin @ http://www.azrin.net
peeabooh: Hmm… in yout case, he/she was already your friend before you have boss-subordinate relationship, ya? Would be interested to know whether you still treat and feel the same with her?
msau: Lying? Ya, I understand that – sometimes white lies are meant for good. But then… some bosses don’t like even a small white lie… I understand the part about not willing to tell every things personal, but what if your boss asks you until the very detail of it, even include your other family members’ things?
haan: Hahaha! I like the last part of your comment: “… if I mind him/her to be my friend.” That is so true!
azrin: Hmm… I wonder if there is a gender difference too. I noticed males-friends are easier to get along, whereby female-friends are harder. Females expect a LOT from friendships, including sharing very intimacy privacy/stories. Whereas for males, good friends normally just require good conversations/clicks, going out for drinks, etc – as long as there is ‘feel good’ relationship, it is sufficient.
I have 2 bosses…hehe since i’m some sought a business consultant to them…
Boss A (FEMALE)
No Pay BUT can stay together & ****(u know..iknowlah)
Boss B (MALE)
With SALARY and POWER to do & buy what ever i want for the company even sacking employees
….hehe like a dream isnt it?….but well….its true to me!!!
and back to the question ” Can your boss be your friend”….my answer is yes!!!….BUT u must some ability’s that can proof to your boss that…..u’re the man/employee/staff that they looking for!