Suzette's Parenting and Breastfeeding Blog

Thanks for leaving your comments on part 1.  I’ve decided to reply in a post, since it is going to be long. 

Well, thanks to your courages, I’ve spoken to MIL again.  Actually she didn’t know that my mom doesn’t allow me to sleep with Ian at night.  She is probably right that it is hard to handle bathing and feeding for Ian.

Feeding is always a challenging task.  It always drive me nuts when I have to feed him, as he literally spit out every mouthful of food, on the floor, in his shirt, etc.  Not vomit, but spit out everything.  My mom definitely can’t handle him, and I for sure won’t want to scold or beat him for doing so when the newborn is around — not to make him think that I have a mei-mei and treat him badly.

Bathing wise, due to confinement rules, I can’t bath him myself, and we never + would not let the maid handle him.  My mom and MIL always have problems dealing with this.  I guess only I can bath him without much hassles.  With the confinement rules, I can’t help.

Therefore, MIL suggested that DH sends Ian to me in the evening after dinner.  We then play for a while and sleep together.  Next day morning, ask my mom to send him to MIL’s house when she is free, probably around 10′ish.

I think that is a good idea, but I have to really make my mom agrees.  Been talking to her about this much earlier but have been rejected.  She wants me to have enough rest at night and want to sleep with me instead.  She is more concerned about my fitness - being my own mother mah!  :)  Anyway, I will try again.

Ya, have to at least make a post a day, to keep everyone from wondering whether I’ve already popped. 

Actually, as posted earlier, my mind is so occupied with the question of when to pop.  So, my whatever posts would be so boring.  All about the same topic.  What is the point of writing then?  Hope I won’t bore everyone to death!

Anyway, my ex-colleage’s EDD is 1 week before mine, and she has given birth 1 day early.  At first, we were wondering we would be hospital mate or not.  Now the answer is clear already loh!

She is now having so many questions on breastfeeding, and she is still in the hospital till Friday, due to baby having jaundice and undergoing light theraphy.  She is feeding the baby round the clock, every 2-3 hours.  I just hope I could be there offer her some help.  Now, we nearly call or sms each other 3 times an hour, coz she has just so many questions.  But glad that she is doing well, though complaint of engorgements.

As for work, I’ve done some achievements by close of business Monday, and my boss was very pleased I was still around to solve those issues.  She even gave me a call yesterday morning, and we happily chatted 15 min (while she was waiting for her flight in the lounge).

She joking said that she is sure baby will come out soon, because she just bought her gift the day before, and there is no reason baby wants to wait any longer to let me have the gift.  Hahahaa!

Well, what else is pending?  Maybe some snacks to be brought to the hospital, and to decide which book I want to bring there to read?  Kekeke, really nitty gritty stuff.  Anyway, my mom won’t allow me to read any books/magazines or watch TV during my confinement.  She said that will make me blind.  So, I can only curi-curi read the books in hospital only. 

I have been reading other mommies’ blogs about their 2nd confinement.  I really envy them.

I have been trying to make arrangements for my confinement, but never come to one that I am satisfied, and I have to settle for this one now.

I will be confined at my mother’s house, with the new born.  My mother will be my confinement lady, with the help of my maid.

However, MIL doesn’t want to ‘let go’ of Ian.  She wants Ian to stay with her during the day.  And everyone insisted that Ian will sleep with his father at night, in our own apartment.

So, day and night, I will not be seeing Ian or be with him.  At most, if DH is free at night (hardly ever in the past 1 year), he will bring Ian to visit me and baby.

My boss warned me that the arrangement might make Ian jealous of the little sister, thinking that she stole mama away from him.  I am worried of that too, and I am sure I will miss Ian too.

I am so sad of this, but no one is on my side.  Everyone keep saying I should rest and should not let Ian disturbs me.  My mother is not supportive of me too, coz she says she is unable to take care of Ian (too mischievious).

I just don’t understand, why every other mothers, with just the help of 1 other person (confinement lady, or MIL, or own mother), can go through the whole confinement period, with their other children?  And for me, I’ve already got a maid, and with the help of another person, I am still restricted from staying with my son?!!!

I can’t stand the idea of being separated from Ian for one whole month.  Why they must make this thing so dreadful for me?  The first confinement is already such a nightmare, and why everyone is trying to make it another nightmare for me?  The closer it is to my EDD, the more I feel sad, worried and fear of confinement.

Like my friend said to me last time: confinement, by the word of it, is not holiday, it means imprisoned! 

Huisia left a comment earlier: “Haha….your recent posts are all regarding “when to pop!”.

Ya, she is right. Actually these few days, what occupying my mind is only ‘when will baby pop?’

Not that I am desperate to have my baby…  All these anxiety actually driven by 2 main factors – worry of baby’s size when day passes, and hate the current work tasks that I have to deal with.

You know, since passing on the work to someone already, I really have no interest in dealing with those nitty gritty stuffs myself. But since I am still around, my boss would still want me to work on them. Furthermore, my replacement also relies on me a lot when I’m around.

Anyway, another issue I have is, I have a business trip scheduled to Beijing in early Sep. That’s just right after I return to work after confinement. I hate to know that it is immediate after I return to work.

Well, if this fella pops earlier, e.g. the past Monday, then I’ll have at least 2 weeks getting used to the working + EBM schedule, before traveling.  It is not easy to express breastmilk while on business travel, especially on long-haul journey like this. And I will be away 1 week. I was hoping that 2 weeks would get me warmed up before the trip, but looks like it is unlikely already.

I hate to leave my then 3-month-old baby for 1 week, but what to do, she doesn’t want to come out earlier.

And, no – I won’t be able to reschedule the trip.

Since I am working from home today and have 2 hours lunch break, I brought Ian and MIL out for lunch.

Ian was very excited when I arrived to pick them up. He was happily yelling “我要 go kai-kai” (I want to go out), when I opened the door for him.

We had a good lunch at Secret Recipe. Ian had been rejected any food for the past 3 weeks, including his favourite milk. Been seeing him losing weight and worrying us. I just wanted to give him different things to try out, to improve his appetite.

Though he didn’t eat much, at least he ate 1/5 of my food and about 2 spoonful of MIL’s. That’s a great improvement, coz he has been spitting out nearly everything put into his mouth. The most stupid thing is, he still puts them into his mouth, but immediately pushes them out with his tongue – that irritates me a lot.

Well, coming back to this lunch trip, it didn’t end well. When I sent them back to MIL’s house, I had to leave quickly without getting out of my car, because I was late for work and there was no place to park my car.  And, Ian, to my surprise, cried very badly seeing me left.

When I called him from my cell phone later, the moment he heard my voice, he broke into tears and cried very badly again. He wanted mama to be back with him immediately. I feel so bad now.

It never happened before, and I think he is really getting more and more attached to me these days. I’m only worry of my future business trips.